mind over matter

Photo by victoriapeckham

Well, it’s nearly Valentine’s Day, and love is in the air. Not the air within a ten-foot radius of me, mind you, but I’m sure it’s out there somewhere. So, since I am a hopeless romantic at heart (and making a concerted effort not to sound bitter), this week’s posts will be all about love, romance, relationships, kissing and sex. And maybe also chocolate and romantic movies, which are currently more applicable to my life. Ah, grad school and its 20/80 male-female ratio.

Some fascinating new research in the journal Evolutionary Psychology claims that “kissing is in fact part of an evolved courtship ritual.” All that smooching gives us chemical and tactile clues about our genetic compatibility and reproductive possibilities with the other person. In other words, kissing is a means of determining the likelihood of a long-term romantic connection. And here you thought it was all in good fun.

The researchers hypothesised that the male preference for open-mouthed, wet kisses allowed them to access subtle information about a female’s reproductive status because a woman’s saliva and breath odour is known to change across her menstrual cycle. Male saliva also contains measurable amounts of the sex hormone testosterone which can affect libido.

The linked article is full of interesting little tidbits:

• Fifty-nine percent of males and 66 percent of females said they had been in a situation where their romantic interest in a person had waned following a “bad” first kiss. (Obvs.)
• Men are less critical than women of things like bad breath and prefer wetter kisses with more tongue contact. (Good to know.)
• Women were far less likely than men to engage in sex without kissing, and to become jealous if they discovered their partner had kissed someone else - regardless of whether the relationship was long- or short-term. (Hear that, men?)
• Seventy percent of men said they thought kissing their partner was an appropriate way to reconcile following a fight, compared with just 58 percent of women. (Figures.)

Need to brush up on your skills? This blog is mildly obsessed with the topic, and there’s always the classic, super-detailed kissing guide from Girl’s Life. I only know it’s there because I’m targeting a feature for their publication and had to click around the website. But honestly, plenty of men far outside GL’s demographic could use a brush-up…or maybe a good primer.